This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Randomize
