She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
