haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize