i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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