First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
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