Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
