I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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