my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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