Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize