people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
