420 ftw
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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