everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
