No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Fuck me I smell like cheese
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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