ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
