I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize
