I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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