babies were throwing up all over the place
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Randomize