I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
