But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
i think i have two assholes
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
