I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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