I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
