Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
