So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
