You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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