So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
