We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
