doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize