WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
