I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
