I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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