i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Randomize
