you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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