Last Night in New York (518)

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• (518): View more from New York

  you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"

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• (518): View more from New York

  I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.

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• (518): View more from New York

  She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her

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• (518): View more from New York

  All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss

  (301): View more from Maryland

  OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?

  (518): View more from New York

  Doritoesssssss

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• (518): View more from New York

  You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops

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• (518): View more from New York

  i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina

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• (518): View more from New York

  I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.

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• (518): View more from New York

  4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.

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• (518): View more from New York

  The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?

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• (518): View more from New York

  i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.

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• (518): View more from New York

  im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'

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• (518): View more from New York

  September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location

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• (585): View more from New York

  Why was I handcuffed to the roof?

  (518): View more from New York

  It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly

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• (518): View more from New York

  just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her

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