Last Night in California (530)

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• (530): View more from California

  I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite

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• (530): View more from California

  As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.

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• (530): View more from California

  I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.

  (1-530): View more from California

  fuck. you.

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• (530): View more from California

  the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo

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• (530): View more from California

  Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.

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• (530): View more from California

  just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life

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• (530): View more from California

  smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers

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• (530): View more from California

  I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me

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• (530): View more from California

  I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!

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• (530): View more from California

  There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.

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• (530): View more from California

  Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.

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• (530): View more from California

  I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.

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• (530): View more from California

  I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.

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• (530): View more from California

  Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud

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