Texts From Last Night · JRra's Favorites

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JRra's Favorites Texts:

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(810): View more from Michigan

According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.

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(563): View more from Iowa

he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes

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(609): View more from New Jersey

just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....

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(865): View more from Tennessee

I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth

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(207): View more from Maine

I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.

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(808): View more from Hawaii

white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"

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