Last Night in New Jersey (856)

Sort By: Date / Good Night / Bad Night

ADVERTISEMENT

• (856): View more from New Jersey

  What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.

  Fav 9 4576 1297

  share tweet
  

• (856): View more from New Jersey

  you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb

  Fav 34 4572 1431

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (609): View more from New Jersey

  i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  youre going to kill that woman one of these days

  Fav 25 4512 1008

  share tweet
  

• (856): View more from New Jersey

  it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.

  Fav 6 4452 2041

  share tweet
  

• (856): View more from New Jersey

  Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.

  Fav 15 4441 1277

  share tweet
  

• (856): View more from New Jersey

  i just sold back the books i vomitted on

  Fav 12 4425 1368

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (856): View more from New Jersey

  we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"

  Fav 4 4407 1144

  share tweet
  

• (856): View more from New Jersey

  They are making fun of natty and blackberries.

  (646): View more from New York

  Tell them they are ugly.

  Fav 8 4223 1444

  share tweet
  

• (856): View more from New Jersey

  i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear

  Fav 28 4207 768

  share tweet
  

• (856): View more from New Jersey

  I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.

  Fav 8 4135 1097

  share tweet
  

• (856): View more from New Jersey

  It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.

  Fav 19 4125 1896

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (856): View more from New Jersey

  are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins

  Fav 16 4047 1510

  share tweet
  

• (856): View more from New Jersey

  Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.

  Fav 11 3999 1607

  share tweet
  

• (856): View more from New Jersey

  2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.

  Fav 8 3979 1291

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT