Texts From Last Night

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(305): View more from Florida

I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb

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(870): View more from Arkansas

Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.

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(587): View more from Alberta

I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so

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(317): View more from Indiana

This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang

(317): View more from Indiana

Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?

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(404): View more from Georgia

We still on for Manwhore Monday?

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(209): View more from California

Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms

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(314): View more from Missouri

Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year

(1-314): View more from Missouri

So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition

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