As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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