I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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