Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
