Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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