Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
