Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize