he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
