we're blogging at a bar
too bad you live with your parents still
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Randomize
