ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
so let's talk penis.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
