I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Randomize