does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
This house was built for laser tag.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Randomize
