just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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