Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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