She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Randomize
